This ensures we take accountability and make positive changes without causing additional harm in our recovery while making amends to such people we cannot make direct amends to. In recovery, we can make an indirect amend with a person we harmed in the past, who since passed away, by volunteering time to a cause they truly cared about in their life. Joi Honer directs the operations that support our alumni in their recovery from mental health and substance use disorders. Ms. Honer, who has been in long-term recovery for over 40 years, has worked in the treatment field for over 33 years. She holds certifications in addiction and co-occurring disorder counseling and a bachelor’s degree in addiction studies, having graduated summa cum laude.
- True changes show that the person is serious and is working little by little to shift towards a positive space with all involved.
- “Freedom” seems to be the word that most clearly describes the essence of Step Nine.
- However, countless individuals and families can attest to how Alcoholics Anonymous has helped them.
- Living amends touches deep parts of our lives and souls if we allow them.
The 12 Steps of AA
- She came home to what she described as “a completely different house”.
- Step 9 also allows one to practice the processes of self-reflection, accountability and making amends, all key components the next step, Step 10.
- You might trigger so much pain and stress that they’ve been trying to work through for a while now.
Managing emotional responses without anger or defensiveness helps handle these challenges. A well-thought-out strategy and readiness can make the amends process more effective and meaningful. Thorough preparation ensures your actions align with your intentions and positively contribute to your recovery journey and the relationships you are trying to mend. To make direct amends, it is important we are willing to make amends to the person face-to-face, no matter what happens, and respond in love and tolerance to anything they say.
Our Programs
For example, Dr. Bob, one of the original founders of the AA program, could not stay sober until he went around town and made amends to all those he had hurt. In many 12-step recovery programs, making amends is an important part of the process. For example, Alcoholic Anonymous (AA)’s ninth step involves making amends to the individuals in your life who were affected by your addiction. The goal of the program is to improve yourself and make strides to be a better person for yourself and your loved ones alike while also remaining sober.
Which Step in AA is the One About Making Amends?
Completing a rehab program is an accomplishment to be proud of, but it’s only the first step on a lifelong journey toward sobriety. For sustained success, you’ll need to surround yourself with a robust support system of people who will cheer you on as you work toward your goals. Change your behavior.The process of making amends does not have to stop after living amends apologizing.
These interactions foster sincerity and openness, essential for the healing process. Feeling ashamed of past mistakes should not prevent you from making amends. Recovery is about aligning your actions with your intentions, which often did not match during the time period of your active addiction. In AA’s Step 8, you’re tasked with making a list of everyone you’ve hurt in any form and become willing to make things right. In Step 9, you take action—making direct amends wherever possible, unless doing so would cause more hurt and harm to the person you’re making amends to.
Can I attend AA if I’m still drinking?
For many, it’s tempting to make amends as soon as possible to “get it out of the way,” but it’s advisable that you take your time to prepare yourself first. People in recovery often struggle with steps 8 and 9 because substance use disorder often comes with destructive behaviors and actions. It makes people do and say things they otherwise wouldn’t without the influence of drugs or alcohol, and these actions often hurt https://importadoraacg.cl/a-goodbye-letter-to-drugs-addiction/ the people around even if inadvertently. An alcoholic in recovery first creates the list of individuals they have harmed during step eight and then divides the list into four categories. The four categories determine the manner in which the recovering alcoholic will express their amends.
In addition, he mentors aspiring health professionals and leads collaborative care through team-based medical models. He also directs treatment strategies and streamlines clinical protocols for effective substance use recovery. The Twelve Steps are guiding principles outlined in the Big Book that chart a recovery course for people tackling alcohol dependence.
We believe everyone deserves access to accurate, unbiased information about mental health and addiction. That’s why we have a comprehensive set of treatment providers and don’t charge for inclusion. We do not and have never accepted fees for referring someone to a particular center.
Freedom: Moving On From Step Nine Of AA Alcoholics Anonymous
In those cases, we may make amends through charitable donations, volunteering, and helping others. Very commonly the cause helped is related in some way to the damage done. To make amends, you must do more than just make apologies for your past drug addiction behavior. Instead, making amends means you apologize for what you’ve done and make it right. We have already begun making amends to ourselves by changing some of our behaviors, attitudes and beliefs. The part of the amends process whereby we change ourselves has an effect on everyone around us and goes on long after we’ve spoken directly to someone we have harmed.
Many successful AA members experienced relapses before achieving long-term sobriety. Return to meetings, work with your sponsor, and use the experience to identify triggers and strengthen your recovery approach. If you or a loved one is struggling with alcohol addiction, contact Discover Recovery today to begin your recovery journey.